What the f**k has happened to Madonna’s face?

Bad plastic surgery?  Stress on marriage due to A-Rod scandal?  Stress from her brother’s new book about her?  Stress because of impending tour?  A little bit of everything?

I love Madonna, but she looks like a shell of her former self.  She looks like a zombie and her arms scare me!

I couldn’t help but to snicker a little bit when I saw this photo.  It is a little bit mean, but kinda funny too!

Some fans held up pictures of Madonna to try to throw off A-Rod at at the Yankees-Toronto Blue Jays game.

I’m guessing those guys are Blue Jays fans.  Just a hunch!

The Times of London, a very reputable newspaper, is reporting that Madonna has met with high-powered British divorce attorney Fiona Shackleton. Shackleton represented Paul McCartney in his infamous split from Heather Mills. Also according to The Times, Guy Ritchie, 39, had been rumored “to have had dealings with a lesser-known Mayfair law firm, Forsters”.

Madonna and Guy are each lawyered-up. It is rumored that they don’t have a pre-nup. This divorce could get ugly.

Justin Timberlake is reportedly getting ready to propose to his girlfriend Jessica Biel. The two have been dating since January last year and rumors are saying they may already be planning a family.

One source said Jessica has not been drinking recently, sparking pregnancy rumours. They said: “Justin is 27 and thinking about marriage and kids.” The source added, “For the first time in his life he is feeling settled and has definitely decided to pop the question to Jessica. He is so happy with her. They spent quite a bit of time apart recently when Justin was working with Madonna. That made him certain Jessica was the person he wanted to spend the rest of his life with.”

Justin wants the wedding to be held on the West Indian island of Mustique becaus it’s private property so he can keep the press out.

His friend added: “Although Justin has lived his whole life in the public eye, he feels his wedding is the one day that should remain private. To get all his close friends and family to Mustique will cost a fortune. But he can’t put a price on how he feels about Jessica. Then there are the rumors about a baby being on the way.”

Justin was very serious with exes Cameron Diaz and childhood sweetheart Britney Spears — but both romances broke up around the four-year mark.

In a new interview with Vanity Fair, the Material Girl — who recently told E! she wants to “go save” the singer — called Spears’ situation “very painful.

“When you think about the way people treat each other in Africa, about witchcraft and people inflicting cruelty and pain on each other, then come back here and, you know, people taking pictures of people when they’re in their homes, being taken to hospitals, or suffering, and selling them, getting energy from them, that’s a terrible infliction of cruelty. So who’s worse off?” she asked.

Madonna — who turns 50 in August — also opened up about her Detroit upbringing, admitting, “I didn’t fit into the popular group.”

“I wasn’t a hippie or a stoner, so I ended up being the weirdo,” she added. “I was interested in classical ballet and music, and the kids were quite mean if you were different. I was one of those people that people were mean to.”

Rather than feeling sorry for herself, she said she “decided to emphasize my differences. I didn’t shave my legs. I had hair growing under my arms. I refused to wear makeup, or fit the ideal of what a conventionally pretty girl would look like. So of course I was tortured even more.”

But she said it “further validated my superiority, and helped me to survive and say, ‘I’m getting out of here, and everyone is a heathen in this school!’”

Madonna’s new album, Hard Candy, is out April 29.

Remember that picture? For giggles, we put up the famous Britney Spears and Madonna “kissing” picture. Christina Aguilera kissed Madonna during that same very performance, but hardly anyone payed attention!

Madonna has a surprising choice when it comes to what she listens to while exercising.

“I actually love Britney Spears’s new album,” she told New York’s Z100-FM Thursday. “I usually work out to her record. I do a combination of pilates and dance aerobics.”

The singer also explained why she gave Justin Timberlake a shot of B-12 while they were collaborating on her new album, Hard Candy.

“The reason I gave him a B-12 [shot] is because we only had a certain amount of days in the studio and I didn’t want him to use that as a lame-a– excuse not to come to work,” she said. “Okay? It’s got nothing to do with butt. I promise you. Listen, I don’t need to give him a shot to see his butt. Duh.”

Madonna – who was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame earlier this month for her 25-year career span – admitted she’s sick of some of her earlier music.

“I’m not sure I can sing ‘Holiday’ or ‘Like A Virgin’ ever again,” she said. “I just can’t – unless somebody paid me like $30 million or something. [Maybe if] some Russian guy wants me to come to the wedding he’s going to have to a 17-year-old, you know it.”

Damn! ‘Like a Virgin’ is one of my favorite Madonna songs. I’m going to be inconsolable if she says she will never sing ‘Material Girl’ again.

“What else is there for me to conquer? Hopefully my ego. How will I know when I’ve succeeded? When I stop caring what anyone thinks.”

Madonna tells the new issue of Q magazine

Presidential candidates don’t just have star supporters – they have celebrity cousins!

Researchers at the New England Historic Genealogical Society discovered that Barack Obama is distant cousins with Brad Pitt and Hillary Clinton is related to Angelina Jolie, Madonna, Alanis Morissette, and Celine Dion.

Obama is also distantly related to six presidents, including George W. Bush.

Pitt and Obama are ninth cousins, linked by Edwin Hickman, who died in Virginia in 1769, the researchers found.

Clinton and Jolie, meanwhile, are ninth cousins, twice removed because they are both related to Jean Cusson who died in St. Sulpice, Quebec, in 1718.